England v Australia, Fifth Test, Day One

England v Australia, 1st Innings, The Oval, Day One, Stumps

England 307/8

England 1st Innings

Johann Strauss c Has-Been Haddin, b The House of Hilf 55
Captain Cook c Little Captain Punter, b Siddle In The Middle 10
Ding Dong Bell b Siddle In The Middle 72
Paul Collingwood, MBE c Mr Cricket b Siddle In The Middle 24
'Hot To' Trott run out like an idiot 41
Matt 'Richard' Prior c Cryin' Shane Watson b Mitchell's Johnson 18
Fred c Has-Been Haddin b Mitchell's Johnson 7
Stuart Bored not out 26
The Ugly Duckling c Has-Been Haddin b Siddle In The Middle 18

Extras (b 12, lb 4, w 3, nb 17) 36

Total (8 wickets, 85,3 overs) 307

Huh. Peter Siddle In The Middle comes good. And here I was, advocating for him to be replaced by Brett 'Scarecrow' Lee for this Test. Good thing I'm not a selector, huh?

OTOH, I would have had Stuart 'Don't Call Me Michael' Clark in the side from the First Test. So I'm not a complete fool.